Difficult Love

I know a girl that when she smiles, the world smiles,

Cause she's got a smile so big

People’s eyes can’t contain it

And it spreads to their lips.

This poem is hers.

Difficult Love

It's difficult not to fall in love with you every time you smile.

It would help if you weren't so happy;

            So full of life and love

                        Your lips are always open.

Maybe then I wouldn't spend every minute

            Thinking of you,

                        Imagining you in my arms when I sleep.

But you can’t help it;

            You are you.

And I can’t help it;

            It’s too difficult not to love you.

                               Jack Shirley

Voices

For a friend I've never met.

Voices

I've never heard your voice,

But I know your sound.

It resonates from your smile;

Reverberates in the cavity of my chest

Like the beating of a heart,

So pure and clear,

My heart can’t help but beat with it,

In harmony;

But that’s how hearts are supposed to beat:        

Pure and proud,

Like a baby’s pulse

In the cavity of his mother’s womb

That widens her smile

As she hears his first sound,

And he recognizes her voice.

Jack Shirley

The Thought of You

A little thought on my mind when I woke up this morning. I don't know how long it will take, but it will be well worth the wait when I meet someone that makes me feel this way again.

The Thought of You

Tender lips.

A hug smile.

Laughter.

Impassioned embrace.

It all seems fresh and lively!

The sweet anticipation!

The momentary escape from monotony.

The thought of you invigorates!

Like the morning sun grows to fill the room,

The thought fills me with life desire,

Lightens my cares,

Brightens my smile.

My mind delights and beckons you

To come and play,

And stay a while.

                      Jack Shirley

Truth

"Truth is true even if nobody believes it." -Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Truth

What is truth?

     But sun setting fire to a mountain ridge,

     Dust kicked up on a gravel road,

     A leaf of grass in a child’s hand,

     Cool sweat on a lover’s lips,

     A stranger’s smile,

       Or a snowflake on bare skin?

Is it more than a simple dance,

     A child’s game of tag,

     A front porch melody?

Deeper than a person’s eyes,

     A family’s prayer,

     Or a last goodbye?

Can you put in words?

     String it out in syllables on a kitchen wall.

     Tape it by the bathroom sink.

Does it change?

     Bend to the president’s will.

     Twist on dark nights in dark places.

Can I speak it?

Can it leave my lips like honey and fire,

     Touching your very soul?

If I can’t speak it, then I’ll write it,

And truth will set that ridge ablaze,

     Kick up that dust,

     Comfort that hand,

     Raise sweat on those lips,

     Bring out that smile,

     And chill your skin.

It will form your dance.

You’ll chase it like a child,

     And sing it on your porch.

And when you look deep in the mirror by your bathroom sink,

     You’ll see it in your eyes.

It’ll cry out in your prayers,

     And make every goodbye sweet like honey.

What I write

     Won’t bend

     Or twist

     Or change

     As it sets you free.

                       Jack Shirley

Romance

I wrote this after a devotional by Kevin Miyasaki in 2010. He told the story of his last night with his wife by her bedside in the hospital. As he held her hand, he was filled with pure love. He said, "That night I discovered what true romance really is." Having seen what happens when a loved one dies, I can think of no better description of true romance. Maybe you feel the same.

A Night of Romance

“Love is watching someone die.” –Ben Gibbard

Knowing doesn't ease the pain,

As we sit alone.

You’re beautiful still the same:

A gurney for a throne.

Deep inside I hold a prayer

That your soul can hear.

I look upon your skin so fair

And see parting near.

I have learned from your eyes;

Now the story rests untold.

As others pass and sympathize.

Your hands grow cold.

Yet your soul cries out to me,

A blink of an eye,

And in that moment I can see

Our love will never die.

I hold your hand for one more night:

A love knit embrace.

You’ll rise with the morning’s light

To see our Savior’s face.

                       Jack Shirley

You can find Kevin's devotional message here: http://www2.byui.edu/Presentations/Transcripts/Devotionals/2010_03_23_Miyasaki.htm

Also, here is a Death Cab for Cutie song on a similar note: http://youtu.be/I483tB12SyE

Joseph's Prayer

I know it's a little late, but this was my Christmas Eve poem this year. 

Joseph's Prayer

Father, are you there?

Please answer my simple prayer.

I’m thy servant and will always be,

But I need to know

Is it of thee,

This child in Mary’s womb?

Her words are marvelous,

Incredible,

But for the burning in my heart,

I would put her away;

I would not believe,

Or ask thee now my Lord.

Yet, my heart yearns to know.

I want so badly to believe

That this is real,

That this burning I feel

Is of thee,

That the Messiah will come

To my house

As my son.

Yet it is too great

For me, a simple man,

To think on such things;

It is too noble

For my humble house.

I have nothing to offer,

No status to give,

Nothing save my heart

And my life

That is thine

And will ever be thine.

I cannot do such great a thing,

Save thou art in it,

And it be thy will.

So I ask thee,

Not in disbelief,

But in my need for strength,

Art thou in this?

For if thou art,

Then I will take Mary to wife,

And I will raise thy son,

For I will ever be

Thy humble servant,

Joseph.

Amen.

                   Jack Shirley

Throne on High

I marvel at the goodness of our Savior, and the power of His atoning sacrifice. His atonement is progressive and perpetual; It not only reaches back to right the wrongs that I have committed, but it heals me in this very moment and reaches forward to right my future course.

In essence, Christ's atonement makes hope in the future possible, and all possible joy springs from it. I can look forward with hope to that great day when we will kneel before His throne, because He makes it possible for me to look forward. Christ is the light by which I see and the joy which I hope to attain.

We Have a Throne on High

We have a throne on high, next to the angels above.

I dare my soul to fly, to that bought by Christ’s dear love.

To me He freely gave, that I may through grace obtain.

My soul He would save, though I would cause Him pain.

I marvel at His goodness, the way He lived his life.

All was done in kindness, so that we might feel His light.

Nowhere near to falter, while in blood He paid the price.

Now I kneel upon the alter, and take the name of Christ.

The way is clearly laid, to that throne on high.

The price of sin is paid, His day of glory nigh.

I pray for wings to take me, to the Father’s throne.

So I can take a knee, and praise a new found home.

                                                   Jack Shirley

Dearest Lord

God has a plan for each of us, and he doesn't make crappy plans.

I have realized that sometimes, when I sin, I am being impatient with the Lord and his timing. When I break his commandments, I am acting as if there is another way to get what I want or need. In reality, there is no other way. Regardless of what I may think, his way is the only way to get what I truly need. His plans and vision are far greater than mine. Accepting that and living by his commandments makes life the best it can possibly be; for that is what God wants for each of us, that life may be as beautiful and full as possible.

Dearest Lord

Dearest Lord,

The Father of my soul,

I am sorry

For what I have done

again.

It seems as if I draw nigh unto Thee

Only to fall from Thy grace;

Only to commit the same sin,

            Over and over.

Thou hast blessed me so much;

Made my life a dream better than my own;

Yet, I am unhappy

Not with Thee,

But with Thy timing.

I lack the faith to believe in Thy promises;

To really grasp the blessings

Afforded those who wait.

It seems faith and impatience

Are pinned against each other.

To wait is to believe.

To sin, is to doubt.

            To settle.

To rely on the carnal now

As if, Thou doest not exist,

And it all matters not.

How could I entertain such thoughts?

Let alone indulge in sin?

I know the truth:

Thou art my God.

Thou hast a plan for me.

Thou hast the power and the means

To accomplish Thy plans.

Thou art pure and holy.

Thou art ever nigh.

Thou knowest all.

And Thou offerest salvation.

            Hope.

            Mercy.

            Redemption.

            Healing.

How can I lose faith in Thee?

For Thou art my joy and my happiness.

My joy is not in far off promises

Or even in instant gratification,

It is in the fact that Thou lovest me

And gave Thy life for me

That I might have life

More real and abundant

Than I had ever known.

Thou art my happiness.

Thou art my goal.

Thou art my strength.

I will no longer be impatient,

For it mattereth not

If Thy promises come today or tomorrow

For I have Thee now.

Thou art the true blessing.

On Thee I rely.

No longer will indulge in this sin,

No longer will I deny Thy existence

To satisfy this lust.

I will believe.

I will be Thy child.

For Thou art the Father of my soul.

Thou art my dearest Lord.

                 Jack Shirley

The Prodigal

This is the poem I was going to share next in a poetry slam. It's a spiritual odyssey that seems to be stuck on repeat in my life.

A Slave and a Master: The Prodigal

I. Sorrowing of the Damned

I did not wish to be a slave,

Not to anyone.

I was a master of my fate

Until all was said and done.

Yet somehow in these chains I’m bound,

Welded through the chest.

A master pulls me where he will;

I do get no rest.

“I didn’t want these chains!” I cry,

Gasping short for breath.

A master spits and slaps my face,

“You did choose your death.”

Is there no balm in Gilead?

No salvation near?

Poison enters through my eyes;

No physician here.

Alone I tremble in despair,

The only thing that’s real.

I close my eyes and do not pray

Because I do not feel.

It’s silent now. I hear a laugh;

The devil at his prey.

He pulls the chain; I follow in vain.

It’s just another day.

II. Faint Hope

Canst thou hear this prayer, my Lord?

In sin I’m wrapped so tight.

The devil’s angels in one accord

Seek to end all light.

My masters two and Thou the one

Who seeks to save my life,

Yet to whom I’m bound, when done,

Will end it with a knife.

For Thy mercy I pray in haste,

Yet I am not Thy friend.

The words I speak are vainly laced,

Shallow to the end.

Look down kindly, I so implore,

On this wretched slave

Who did sell for Satan’s lure

What thou freely gave.

III. Redemption

Dearest friend, raise thy head.

Salvation is in sight!

I have come to free the dead,

To fill thy life with light!

Good tidings are at thy door;

Liberty I preach.

I will free thee and do more

Then thou now beseech.

For in me, though thou mourn,

Thou wilt be comforted,

Godly virtue thou wilt adorn,

And sin’s stain be rid.

I break the chains that hold thee tight,

The prison in which you’re bound;

And grant to thee a new life,

One with glory crowned.

Thou art no longer to be a slave,

But to be a son.

And to master thy own fate

Through the Holy One.

Out of love, I give my life

For thee, my dearest friend.

May thou know my love for thee

Never hath an end.

Jack Shirley

Poetry Slam: Why I Write

I wrote this for the poetry slam and wish I could recite it to you because it's meant to be spoken not read. It more or less goes through what I see in an average week as a social worker. It's also a cry to stop judging people because their lives aren't what we think they should be.

Why I Write

There’s a man who sits on a curbside bench just down the street wearing a beanie and a winter coat in the heat of summer and he doesn’t act like you expect and he doesn’t talk like me or you, but I still understand, and I write for him;

Because his awkward grin deserves a smile back and his disordered speech shouldn’t fall on deaf ears; because if he can be optimistic, why shouldn’t I?

In a house a little further down there’s a boy laying in front of a TV who slept through school today because his mom was too depressed to get him up because she has to raise him on her own and her life isn’t what it was supposed to be, and I write for him, and I write for her;

Because all they can do is try and they should try, and keep trying.

If you take a turn and walk a block or two there’s a theater with flashing neon lights playing nothing but the best Hollywood has to offer and in front you’ll see couples in droves crowding in to see the latest romantic comedy and inside on a row alone you’ll see a girl who took herself to the show because no one else would, and I write for her, but not only her, I write for the fake-baked beauties and the fohawked Romeos they came with, I write for the quiet couple who use pop and popcorn to replace the chemistry they once had, and I write for the young lovers on the back row who just plain don’t have clue; because they all stare at the same twisted romantic drivel and wish it was them; and they’re all lonely , whether they came alone or not;

Because they need to know that they’re reality is better than that screen and they shouldn’t need a director to tell them what living is.

And if you’ll walk with me a little further we’ll come to a house, you might not want to stop at, with a man inside about my age sitting in a dark room with the door locked staring at a flickering computer screen who wishes he could look away but he can’t, and I write for him;

Because if you knew the fight he’s in you wouldn’t blame him for slipping a time or two, and if you look in his pained eyes you’d see he’s just as pure as you or me, he just can’t see it yet because the unholy stigma, the deep shame society places on his shoulders is more than he can bare.

And I write for the wife who’s crying in that same house and doesn’t think she can take it anymore because this isn’t how her life was supposed to be, and I don’t blame her, but she tries and she should try, and keep trying.

I could take you further down the street, but in the end, I write for you;

Because you’re the one who will hear these words, and you’re the one who will understand, and you’re the one who will come to see that we’re all worth writing for.

Jack Shirley

The Healing Spring

I've thought a lot about prayer lately. I've decided to pray and not to act, is to not pray at all. As Elder Ballard recently stated, "We are responsible for the salvation of our own souls."

The Healing Spring

A body ravished by disease

Lay lifeless on the ground,

Sprawled beside the healing spring

That it never found.

A man that had but lift his hand

And dip within the spring,

Didn’t move or turn his head

Or even do a thing.

He cried and wallowed for relief,

But no one heard the sound.

So he lay without a prayer

On the unforgiving ground.

“Why not move and save yourself?”

A voice seemed to say.

“I have faith; I’ll be healed,

But not in such a way.

I need but pray.” He replied

From the spot of ground

Where now his lifeless body lay

By the spring he never found.

                       Jack Shirley

Affirmation

"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."

Phillipians 4:13

Poem of Affirmation

There is hope and there is love;

There is a Savior up above,

And if you look, you will see

His arms of hope stretch out to thee.

Do not doubt, and do not fear

Christ, our Lord, is ever near,

And in his arms you will find

Peace for your worried, troubled mind.

So lift your head and look above,

And let him fill you with his love.

                        Jack Shirley

The Leaves of Spring

I love this time of year: rebirth and new growth. I wrote this poem a couple years ago while watching the tree outside my window put out new leaves. 

My Bedroom Window

The leaves are green,               serene,

           merely little buds of spring.

The birds’ content,              heaven sent,

           just letting their voices ring

                  through little buds of spring.

                                     Jack Shirley

Thy Words

"I glory in plainness; I glory in truth; I glory in my Jesus, for he hath redeemed my soul from hell."
-Nephi

Thy Words 

Simple, sweet,

Thy words complete

The yearnings of my heart;

So all the more

I implore

For Thee to impart

Thy loving grace,

Thy sweet embrace,

Thy words of eternal life

That move my soul

Till it is full

Of sweet and healing light.

Jack Shirley

Healing Water

The Savior's love is the greatest gift we will ever know.

Healing Water

Crystal water, cool and clear,

Full of Spirit, yet calm on a summer’s morning

Glistens in the noon day sun.

 

When beheld, eyes stare in awe,

Words lose meaning, and lips stand still,

Calm overcomes the troubled mind.

 

Sweet water, like a mountain stream.

With one sip, guilt and pain fade away

As peace fills the void.

 

Beautiful water, that when partook,

Tastes like life eternal.

 

How I yearn for its soothing taste,

Its sweet savor on my lips.

 

Peaceful water, cool and clear.

Beautiful water, like a mountain stream.

Sweet water, that when partook,

Heals the wounded heart.

 

Crystal water, flows from loving hands.

My Spirit calm, mind clear on a Sunday morning,

My countenance glistens in the Savior’s love.

     Jack Shirley

Pretty Girl

New song I wrote for a good friend. (Sorry the guitar sounds like crap, i'll record another one sometime.)

Pretty Girl

Pretty girl, with eyes that shine,

Why do tears fall on your skin so fine?

I know it’s hard when you’re on your own,

But you don’t have to do this alone.

Pretty girl, I see you smile wide

When your little boy lays by your side.

Life may not go exactly as you planned,

But I see hope when you are hand in hand.

Each day is but a stepping stone

Towards a place where your dreams are known.

God will gently light the path

With tender mercy and your child’s laugh.

It ain’t easy being on your own,

But God will make sure that you’re never alone.

Pretty girl, life may try your faith,

But God will bless you with love and strength.

Pretty girl, when your mind is set

You make it happen, on that I can bet.

I see your struggles and your dreams too,

And I can bet that they’ll all come true.

Pretty girl with a fight so strong,

Don’t you worry if it might take long.

You’ve got the strength and God has a plan;

Time will lead you to that perfect man.

And pretty girl, he will hold you tight,

And love till it’s all made right.

Time will dry the tears from your skin so fine

Pretty girl, how your eyes will shine.

                                     Jack Shirley

Christmas Poem: The Grace of God Shines Tonight

Last year on Christmas Eve.

The Grace of God Shines Tonight

The grace of God shines tonight,

Brightening the evening sky.

A new star with endless light,

Were the babe doth lie.

If you listen you might hear

The baby faintly cry.

Love replaces doubt and fear

With His gentle sigh.

Dearest Savior of my soul,

I feel Thy love.

I feel full

Of joy and peace

That only cease

When I leave Thy grace,

And face a darkened sky.

Yet even then,

I feel Thy love.

I feel Thee beckoning me home.

The son that’s lost his way,

I can only say,

“I love you.”

“I need Thee more than I can understand.”

You take my hand.

You take me home.

In every fiber of every bone,

I feel Thy love.

I feel Thy grace,

And just in case I feel alone,

You give the greatest ever known:

Thy Spirit.

I feel it on this holy night…

…I feel Thy love.

                         Jack Shirley

Merry Christmas!

A simple thought foe Christmas I had on Christmas Eve this year...

Remember

Midst the giving and gifts,

The bustle of December,

One word comes to mind:

Simply—Remember.

Remember your youth,

So happy and free,

When each Christmas morning

Set under the tree

Were candy and presents

That lit up the eye

And made you believe

That reindeer could fly.

Remember your blessings

While you unwrap

The gifts that little ones

Place on your lap,

And give them a hug,

As they smile with glee,

For Christmas is more

Than what’s under the tree

Remember your God,

As you sit in your chair

The kids fast asleep

Without worry or care,

For His gifts that give

These moments their light

And make Christmas Eve

A magical night.

Remember the Child,

So tender and poor,

Who lay in a manger

With dirt for a floor;

Who lived his life,

Each moment, each day,

So that we might live

Together someday.

For in Him we live;

By Him we stand,

And each gift we get

Comes from His hand.

In the moments we cherish,

Throughout each December,

Let us joy in His love

And humbly remember.

                     Jack Shirley

Each Woman

A simple thought on dating. 

Each Woman

Each woman has her own way;

Her own way of laughing, smiling, and loving.

Each is beautiful in her own way:

Some for their purity and grace,

Some for their understanding,

Some for kindness,

Some for devotion.

Each I love for her own way.

None is greater than the least.

With my eye to judge,

Selection is a game of timing and luck

Not of set criteria:

Some wrote list of what is better than the rest.

A woman can’t be loved through such a lens,

Cause each woman has her own way.

                               Jack Shirley

Aliona

Moved by a chance passing on the steps of Capital Normal University in Mid-September... 

Aliona

It was a bright, blue September day

And I passing on my way

Heard her voice and saw her smile,

From crowded steps of polished tile,

Almost lost, all but gone,

In the sea of thought I drift upon,

I returned to the day

Awakened by her friendly way.

In her warm and gentle smile

My thoughts have since dwelt a while,

For in a moment she was gone

And I was left to drift along. 

                       Jack Shirley

Willow's Sway

I wrote this surrounded by willows and crowds of Chinese people in a park in Beijing.


Willow's Sway

The Willow weeps beside the lake.

Beneath its boughs I find

Shelter from mid-autumn’s rush

In a willow’s peace of mind.

Like its leaves hang carelessly,

So I think shall I,

Let my cares become the wind

And drift within the sky.

As I sway with the breeze,

I no longer see

My role and part in the play

Of what is to be.

I’m a simple face with simple thoughts

Swaying with a crowd

Of simple people with simple lives;

No distinction to be proud.

In each breeze and touch of sun

We find our heart’s content

To simply live upon the earth

Our God to us has lent.

I’m awakened by the cities moan;

The willow can’t detain.

I venture back into the busy world,

To my minds disdain.

                              Jack Shirley

Chance Meeting- 萍聚

The Chinese have a saying to describe relationships, "萍水相逢," that roughly means "we are like duckweed swaying in the water that meet by chance.”

This is my translation of a famous Chinese song that describes two people parting, thankful just that they got the chance to meet. I feel that we are all like grass swaying in the water; we are lucky to meet the people we do, even if in time our paths must part with theirs.

Chance Meeting- 萍聚

No matter how things end,
At least we had the chance to meet.

We need not constrain each other

With vain words or promises;

For just this chance to have one another,

I tell you, that’s enough for me.

In one’s life, there are many memories;

I hope that I am in yours.

 

                             Jack Shirley

     

Borrow You

I don't think we are meant to be alone. We are to be in pairs; to have someone to lean on and trust in. This poem describes two people coming together for the first time and learning to give and to take...

(This was my first attempt at a poem with a chiastic structure. Every concept repeats itself: the first is last, the second is second to last, etc...)

Borrow You

I am going to borrow you
Rest my head upon your shoulder
Weave our hands together
Smile in your eyes
Feel you breathe
In rhythm
As I breathe
Trust in my eyes
Weave our dreams together
Rest your heart upon my shoulder
Borrow me

                                             Jack Shirley